falling down

OH MY WORD. i am a screwball. and i fall on my face again before You. i'm sorry i'm so faithless and i'm so sorry i am not joyful and i'm so sorry i forget SO EASILY how absolutely AMAZING and GINORMOUS You are.
i have some amazing pictures of the sky. but it's not because i am any kind of photographer. it's because sometimes the mountains and sky and water make it impossible for the picture-taker to mess up. my soul friend--she is a photographer. she has some amazing pictures of not only the sky, but the most random things--traffic lights, signs, streets, brick buildings, dead leaves. she's an artist that way.
you know, anyone can take something beautiful and present it as beautiful. it takes an artist, a master designer, to take something ugly and mundane, and present it as beautiful. that is what You have done. and are doing. You have taken me, in all my filth and smallness, and have covered me, flooded me, drowned me in Your grace and righteousness. i am clean and beautiful in Your sight. and yet i am not there. i have not 'arrived'. You are taking me, even still, and shaping and pruning and refining and sifting. i am sorry. but i am so SO glad. thank You for being faithful--Your Love endures forever, and Your faithfulness through all generations. thank You for being my Joy--the Joy of the LORD is my strength. thank You for waiting patiently with open arms, some hydrogen peroxide, a band-aid, and a kiss.
and so i stand up again. maybe i should just stay on my knees...